He laughed saying, "I would not have done it for anyone else," As Ethan talked I once again felt like I had butterflies in my stomach and felt that warm glow in my loins, I couldn't believe he was still having this affect on me, after almost two weeks not seeing him.Ethan said, "you really should try to come over in the evening to look at the lamp. If it isn't what you had in mind, we could look in a couple of the new antique catalogs I've just gotten, to see If you could see anything else you might like." Plus, I'm really looking forward to making good on my offer of a nice quiet dinner at one of the outside restaurants and after dinner, a nice stroll along the dimly lit street's of the District, I'm sure you'll find it to be a very romantic way to spend an evening."As he was talking, my mind went their. I was having dinner with this young, very handsome, dark Frenchman. After dinner and wine, we were strolling slowly down the dimly lit streets, stopping only to steal a soft kiss,. Please call me. We need to talk. I'll do anything I can to make this right. I love you. Please call me."I took the phone into the bathroom with me so I could hear it in the unlikely event that he called me back promptly. I had no reasonable expectation that he would call but I was not willing to take the risk that I would miss his call.I turned on the water in the shower. I made it very hot. I wanted to wash away whatever I could of what I had done today. All I succeeded in doing was ridding myself of any remaining traces of midlife. I washed thoroughly inside to make sure of that as well.Happy anniversary to us.It had taken all my strength to try to keep it together to think of what I might do to start making amends, to make plans to start the process. Nothing remained. I sank to the tile floor and started to sob. I didn't slow down until I became aware that the water was now cold.I exited the shower and toweled off. Instead of sobbing now, I was shivering.Being alone is not a.
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